I'm really afraid of watching The Fault in Our Stars because I know I'm going to dissolve into a puddle of tears while watching it and I don't want anybody to see me in that state. Maybe I'll watch it alone and strangers around me will be staring at the wreck I'll be in that Golden Village cinema seat and scurrying away. Or maybe I'll watch it with people anyway and I'll be repeatedly telling myself 'no tears no tears no tears' and I'd have a constipated look on my face. Anyway, it's coming out in June and I'll have plenty of time to decide how I'm going to watch it.

"You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world...but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices." -- Augustus Waters.
What a very generous way of describing people.
I guess I've always strove for perfection. And I've got myself disappointed time and time again, picked myself up and started striving for perfection again.
Not anymore I guess. The world as I know it has dissolved into a thousand broken fragments; I guess it happened gradually but I've only noticed it now.
But there's something pretty about viewing life through a thousand fragments-- could you imagine the sunlight bouncing off them? Shining through them and splitting into different colours?

And TFIOS has got me thinking about perfection in another sense-- in terms of a life partner. Who the heck is as perfect as Augustus Waters? I bet if the main leads didn't get separated (by death), and they got married, they'd be quarrelling regularly 5 years into their marriage and I don't know, they might get a divorce which is quite fashionable nowadays.
I broached the topic casually with a fellow fangirl of TFIOS. She smiled kinda knowingly and said, I don't think Augustus is perfect.
Right.

I need to stop thinking that perfection exists. I shall continue viewing life through the thousand broken fragments that I've amassed.


listening to this on repeat because a) it's lovely b) it's the tfios soundtrack!!!
onerepublic is ALWAYS LOVELY