Living life dangerously.
A nicer way to say how I'm so pressed for time but I have no choice but to do the stuff I need to do anyway, despite a lack of confidence about the quality of my work.
These days I haven't been totally present even though I might have been physically present. Sigh. I think I'm just built to not be able to function well with lack of sleep. I think the prof must have noticed my rather vacant expression about twice today. She's the fiercest prof ever. Luckily she was in a good mood, and the gods were probably watching over me, because she didn't scold me but looked in my general direction and said, you need to fake your enthusiasm a bit better. And note: I wasn't sleeping! My face just looked vacant I guess.
Oh my, I want my life back.