I'm sinking into a waterspout of apathy. No, this is bad, this is bad. I got a bit disturbed by a quote I came across saying, "If a man hasn't found something he would die for, he isn't fit to live." I feel almost nothing for my university apps. I'm excited about the course but I'm not excited at all about applying. Which just shows that I'm lazy. It's not healthy to have university and scholarship apps taking up all my time, all my thoughts.
The best thing about yesterday was how I taught myself (with the help of a youtube video) how to play 2 songs on the guitar-- no chords yet, just individual strings. But still something to brag about :) The next best thing was that I got to watch my Korean drama on Channel U. The third best thing? Sleeping.

At this moment, I'm sitting at a window invigilating 16 people for their entrance test. I've run out of inspiration to write anything and everyone is off somewhere else being busy with their lives. D: So here's a note to myself, to finish all university apps by this Friday.

It wasn't until yesterday that I realized that even though I've graduated from school for a few months already, I still have this little streak of insecurity that I'm lousy and other people are smarter, better than me. I know it doesn't make sense and I'm trying to get rid of this nasty, unhealthy feeling that I've felt all my schooling years.

I was assembling my seconday school certificates last night and I realized that even with decent grades, my teacher put down in the remarks column that I should set higher goals and work harder. I know it's not even wrong of her to write something like that, possibly to encourage me more, but I still can't fully accept this sort of attitude towards things: studying, life, etc. My result slip didn't reflect straight As but it was good, in my opinion. Why work so hard to get straight As when you could be doing something more worthwhile? After all, a meaningful life is not characterized by pure mugging.

I'm sure you've felt the same way before, when you did something that you thought was really good, but others didn't think it was good enough.

That was just some little issue I've been thinking of since last night (now it's morning, a new day of slacking at work). Oops did I just say that? :)

Feeling so bored! Maybe I should really have taken the effort to find a job somewhere else. Okay no point regretting. Because...
"The happiest people do not have the best of everything; they make the best of everything." :3
Yup. New life motto. Alongside the one I display on my blog on the bar.
Went for NUS open house again just to ask more questions. I felt excited after visiting NUS. :)
Here's a song from the 90s. I love songs from the 90s because they do not reek of auto-tuning. I do like electronic dance music sometimes, if done artfully, for example, Avicii's DJ music. This song is just upbeat and it lifts my mood well. :)

The nicest people aren't always treated the nicest, and the ones who are not so nice get treated more nicely than they sometimes deserve. It takes a lot of effort to be nice.

I wonder this almost everyday: Why am I so free? @@ It's a good time to do something productive. I think my job is the same as me spending my day at home-- I can do whatever I like up here in this office.
Anyway, I just read this essay my friend's senior sent her about studying NUS law. It makes NUS law sound so busy; she sounds like she's stressed and she says she doesn't have time for family and friends. So, can I bring myself to be that dedicated to studying law?
Here's a video that I saw on facebook. I think I like what she's saying. The title of the video is "The Power of Introverts". :)

I haven't gotten inside my head for quite a while now.

I feel like I've been treated too nicely by all my family and friends, so that I don't recognize it when other people are being nice to me too. :) I shall open my eyes more.
Suddenly I'm reminded of the times I didn't treat my family very kindly, e.g. ignoring them or snapping at them even though they were just trying to have a good time/help me out. And they are still treating me well. It seems like I have a lot to learn in terms of caring for others.
How could such a dampening thought occur to me on Monday?! When I've already suffered from Monday blues.
I suddenly feel excited about the thought of applying to NUS's business course and USP at the same time. :D Should I? I always make decisions and then change them unexpectedly. I rarely have decisions set in stone.