Feeling so pensive today (i actually typed 'pensieve' and wondered for a while...). Listening to a remix of Wait (M83) by Kygo, which is awesome and dreamy and really stimulates those pensive cells in my brain.
Can't really put my thoughts into coherent words. I'm thinking about how true to myself I have been throughout my life. Have I been squeezing myself into facades? Yes I have, but not all the time. When were those times I was living life behind a facade? When were those times I was truly myself? When is it okay to be 'behind a facade'?
Have I been afraid to live? And probably the answer is yes. But why should I be afraid to live when I'm even more afraid of death and of the unspeakable loss?
Such heavy topics.
And I should stop thinking of them. Although they are genuine questions, it is always better for me to project my thoughts outwards and start. living. life. itself.
Like all hard questions in life, you can think and think about them while an infinity of sunrises and sunsets pass, and you will still have no definite answer. Maybe then, what really matters is that I keep those questions in my mind's pocket; questions are more useful than answers. Maybe a beautiful life is one that collects questions, rather than answers.